Skip to Content (Press Enter)

Supporting family caregivers during the holidays and beyond

  • By Patty Gibson, MD, FAPA - Medical Director for Behavioral Health
  • October 1, 2025

Being a caregiver for a loved one is an important job – and it can be a tough one.

 

Caregivers help meet their loved ones’ health needs while still allowing them to enjoy the comforts of home. It’s usually better for the patient, but it can take a toll on the person caring for them.

So how can you show your appreciation and support to someone who selflessly performs this challenging labor of love?

According to A Place for Mom’s 2023 State of Caregiving Survey, there were more than 41 million caregivers in the United States at that time, and 82% felt emotionally, physically and mentally drained due to their role as caregivers.

Caregivers should ask for and accept help from other family members and friends. It is good for the patient, the caregiver and other helpers. Some of the moments of doing daily activities can create some close and precious memories. I created such memories while caring for my own mother who developed Parkinson’s disease.

Caregivers must put on their “oxygen masks” first. Self-care is essential, and what is needed varies over time.

As we recognize National Family Caregivers Month in November and look to the holidays ahead, here are some ways to offer your presence as a present – a true gift of the heart.

A woman hugging her mom from behind

Offer your help

Sometimes, caregivers are so overwhelmed that they don’t know how to ask for help. Here’s how to start the conversation.

Reach out – Check on caregivers regularly, calling or texting them to ask how they’re doing.

Ask questions – Ask what you can do to help. Be prepared, though. At first, they may tell you they don’t know how you can help. If that happens, ask them more about what they do daily to learn what part of their caregiving is a real struggle.

Be specific – Offer small ways you can quickly help them. Scale it down to increase the chance that they will accept your help.

Care for the caregiver

Care notes – Send encouraging “thinking of you” notes, without the expectation of a response.

Gifts of comfort – Give massage or manicure certificates or baskets filled with soothing items like plush socks, bath bombs or flavored teas. And if you give a gift that requires them to leave home – like a manicure or massage – you may need to make arrangements that will allow them to use it, like staying with the patient while the caregiver goes out.

Meals matter – Offer prepared meals or send a gift card for a meal delivery service.

Take good care – Take them out for a quick cup of coffee to give them a change of scenery or spend time with them at home, chatting, watching a movie or putting together a puzzle. Again, though, taking them out may require that you provide someone to look after the patient while the two of you are out of the house.

Two hands holding each other

Tackle a task

Sit in – Sit with the patient or schedule respite care from a local service or trusted sitter so the caregiver can care for themselves.

Stay over – If the patient needs care throughout the night, offer to take a shift overnight and let the caregiver get some solid sleep. This may require that the caregiver give you a quick orientation/training on how to handle things that are likely to occur during the night.

Appointment assistance – For doctor visits, offer to serve as a driver, a second set of ears, a notetaker, a care assistant or an emotional support person.

House help – Wash and fold laundry, vacuum or dust. Walk their dog, take out the trash, mow the lawn, rake leaves, water plants, etc.

Run errands – Pick up prescriptions, dry cleaning or groceries for them.

Organize – If needed, help the caregiver with things that could make their job easier. You could set up a calendar, create a filing system for medical forms and bills, add reminders to the caregiver’s phone for their loved one’s medication schedule, set up an automatic medication dispenser, etc.

Play dates for kids – If a caregiver has young children, invite them over to play or take them out for a fun outing.

Note to caregivers

There are times when the caring comes from not sharing – things like the flu or other infectious illnesses. Annual flu shots are now available. After checking with your loved one’s provider, make sure they get their vaccine, and you do, too. This will help prevent both of you from getting the flu. Additional tips for preventing viruses like the flu include:

  • Stay home when you’re sick.
  • Sneeze into the bend of your elbow or a tissue, not the palm of your hand.
  • Wash hands often with soap and water or when that’s not possible, use an alcohol-based hand sanitizer.
  • If your provider can’t see your loved one or you quickly, consider a virtual or urgent care visit.

Thank you for what you do. According to the National Academy of Medicine, family caregivers provide a dramatic 90% of long-term care in the United States. Please consider the additional ways to take good care of yourself:

  • Accept offers of help from relatives and friends and consider joining a caregiver support group.
  • Seek assistance through organizations like the ones in the list that follows.
  • Take breaks from caregiving to socialize with others.
  • Remember to be flexible and open-minded.
  • Be realistic about how much you can accomplish in one day and give yourself some grace when things don’t go as you’ve planned.
  • Realize that your emotional stress from caregiving can add to your own fatigue and difficulty in making decisions.
  • It is important to continually balance how to give your loved one as much independence and autonomy as possible but keep them safe.
  • Your loved one may not be able to express their fears, anxiety, depression, and anger. Those feelings may look like resistance and make things more difficult.
  • Caregivers should encourage others to treat their loved ones with respect and dignity. Sometimes, healthcare professionals, people in stores or other family members may not have the patience to listen and continue to treat the “patient” as an independent individual.
  • It is caring and loving to plan ahead for your person by creating an advanced directive, getting power of attorney, developing a revocable trust, and will. Make sure life, health and home insurance policies are in order and have yourself or another trusted loved one granted access to your loved one’s banking and finances.
  • Five Wishes is a great resource and way to have important conversations about goals, dreams, wishes – as well as celebrating memories. This can give everyone a sense of being able to make choices in a time when everyone can feel helpless.

Resources for caregivers

There are several resources in Arkansas to assist caregivers:

  • The AARP Caregiver Resource Guide offers a wide variety of tips and support for family caregiving, from the basics and care at home to medical, financial and legal topics.
  • The Family Caregiver Alliance helps connect family caregivers to local public, nonprofit, and private programs and services closest to their loved ones.
  • The Arkansas Department of Human Services Division of Aging and Adult Services offers information and assistance, care management, nutrition services (through Meals on Wheels), legal assistance and services for family caregivers through the Family Caregiver Support Program.
  • Meals on Wheels is a program that works with communities to make sure no senior is left hungry or in isolation.
  • VA Caregiver Support Program, sponsored by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, offers support to caregivers of veterans through peer support mentoring, skills training, coaching, telephone support, online programs and referral stipends, a support line and more.
  • The Area Agency on Aging assists in finding information on programs like Meals on Wheels, senior centers, transportation options and more.
  • CareLink is a resource for senior services in central Arkansas that serves both homebound and active older people and their family caregivers with the services and support they need to remain independent in their own homes. Services include Meals on Wheels, HomeCare, Family Caregiver Support, Fitness and Wellness classes, pet care assistance and senior centers.
  • Alzheimer’s Association provides resources, including a 24/7 helpline, an online community and support groups.
  • Lewy Body Dementia Association website offers caregivers information about Lewy body dementia, support groups and more.
  • National Hospice & Palliative Care Organization provides patient assistance programs to help individuals living with rare diseases. Assistance ranges from medication and financial help with insurance premiums and co-pays to caregiver respite and travel assistance for clinical trials.
  • Eldercare Locator is a public service of the Administration for Community Living, administered by USAging, that connects you to nearby services for older adults and their families.
  • Center for Arkansas Legal Services and Legal Aid of Arkansas, Inc. are nonprofit organizations that provide free civil legal help to low-income Arkansans.
  • Lucet, a behavioral health company, offers both behavioral health expertise and clinical research. Its toolkit offers family caregivers and their aging loved ones resources like articles on dealing with loneliness, managing finances, advocating for the aging, aging at home and more.